I realize it's a bit late for a holiday-related post, but I've never had the best timing. In fact, my timing is horrible. This is a well-known and documented fact.
That having been said, allow me to provide some ideas I've had bottled up for some time [two years], pertaining to holiday screen printed t-shirts. Once again, another million dollar list of ideas.
These shirts would be made with minimalism in mind, except where noted in brackets.
#1: FUCK ME, IT'S CHRISTMAS [a tree decal is on the lower right corner, with Christmas lights adorning most of the shirt, you know, to draw as much attention possible.]
#2: Happy Hanukkah. Fuck off. [A monorah is located in the center of the shirt, between the two phrases. The candle in the middle is taller than the rest, resembling a middle finger.]
#3: Happy B-day Jesus! [Actually, this one's a tank-top, to appeal to southern mobile home owners/renters. Cake and balloons adorn the bottom portion of this shirt.]
#4: Merry Christmas [seems innocent enough, save that the phrase "Capitalism Day" has an X drawn through it, and "Merry Christmas" is doodled very helter skelter above and below, almost as graffiti. A cross flanked by dollar signs decorates the lower hemisphere.]
#5: I celebrate KWANZA, honky! [An emphatic clenched fist rises into the air.]
#6 !FESTIVAS! [Just a mini-skirt celebrating the false Costanza holiday.]
#7 I'm a BUDDHIST. Relax. Take a breath. Enjoy. [Made of hemp.]
Millions, I say.